Rocking My World And Hopefully Others Along The Way...

idiocencratic @ 2009-06-03T17:25:00

2009-06-03T22:27:23Z

For once in my life I would love it if my friends would do something for my birthday where I do not have to plan it. Do I think that it is going to happen? Probably not.

Blah blah blah

2009-04-20T04:45:54Z

It has been a little bit since I posted. Have some new people following and thought I would do a rehash for what is going on in my life.

As of Wednesday, April 15th (yeah tax day) I have been officially accepted into the MBA program at William Woods. I will graduate in December of 2010. And for the family that is reading this I will be walking this time. I also had a joke with my mother on Friday about this. After I graduate, keep in mind I was the last one in my family to get their bachelors degree, my oldest brother will be the least degree'ed in the family. Which is just going to be great. I love it. Might have something to do with the fact that he constantly gives me the feeling that he thinks I am looser.

I have also decided that in this time I will become fluent in Spanish, German, and Japanese. I think it will be good for business and dealing with a global economy. I am pretty sure about the Spanish and the German. Not to sure about the Japanese. I tried it once in school and I was just not that entertained by it. I am kind of fascinated in learning Hebrew. But that would be for pure fun at its best.

I have listed a goal for my job title. It will be Director of a museum. Still working with people and history but doing it to preserve it for future generations. I am also loving the ethics part of my classes. I love me some ethics. Is it wrong that I tend to get an adrenaline rush when I even think about it? So who knows where I will end up.

I am going on a rant here.....

2009-03-22T08:05:32Z

I know that the economy is tough for everyone around. I understand that.

People need to stop acting so god damned crazy. Yes it is bad. Yes things are tight for EVERYONE. But I am sorry if you did not earn the money by working then you do not deserve the money that is worth the job that you did not do. If you work a minimum wage job at McDonalds guess what you are entitled to the fucking money that your minimum wage job allows you. If you want more money get a better paying job (if you can find one) or improve your situation so you can. Do not come knocking to the doors of the people who bust their fucking asses to earn money for their families and do well at it. YOU DO NOT DESERVE THEIR MONEY. Sorry we do not live in a socialistic or communist state. If you feel that we should take from the haves and give to the have nots. THEN FUCKING MOVE OUT OF THE COUNTRY. YOU DO NOT DESERVE THE MONEY SOMEONE GETS FOR BUSTING THEIR ASS FOR 80+HOURS A WEEK WHEN YOU DECIDE TO WORK A PART-TIME JOB. That is not what America was founded on. YOUR FUCKING ATTITUDE IS KILLING THIS COUNTRY. GET OFF YOUR GODDAMN ASS AND GET OUT THERE AND PROVIDE FOR THE LIFESTYLE THAT YOU WANT NOT THE LIFESTYLE THAT YOU FEEL THAT YOU DESERVE BUT SHOULD NOT HAVE TO WORK FOR BECAUSE OTHERS MAKE MORE THAN YOU. It is call drive people. Get it. Then you can be a part of the haves and get out of the catagory of the have nots. And please do not come down on me, I understand that most of the people that are in the have not catagory are not their by choice. BUT IT IS THE FUCKERS THAT SIT AND MILK THE SYSTEM THAT FUCK IT UP FOR EVERYONE. YES I AM TALKING YOU MOTHER OF 8 THAT COLLECT WELLFARE AND ALL YOUR BABBIES HAVE DIFFERENT DADDIES. YES I AM TALKING TO YOU, THE BUM SITTING ON THE COUCH BECAUSE YOU LIKE SITTING HOME AND DRINKING BEER INSTEAD OF WORKING. NOT BECAUSE YOU ARE INJURED OR HAVE A DISEASE BUT BECAUSE YOU FEEL THAT THE GOVERNEMENT OWES YOU SOMETHING. FUCKING WAKE UP.

I do not owe you anything. You do not deserve any of my money. Own your shit and take responsibility for your situation if it is one that could have been avoided. I am tired of listening, reading, and hearing about how hard it is. You are not the only one in that boat. The entire country is in it. But there are still people who get up every day, get dressed, and go to work not knowing if they are going to have a job the next day. But you now what they bust their ass for that day so they can truly claim that it was nothing that they did that caused them to loose their job. Can you say the same? If you can you are not part of the problem. If you cannot guess what you are the problem.

Someone recently told me "People who own their mistakes become successful in life, those who do not do not succeed." In all honesty that is the truth.

Stop looking for a handout or for the wealth to be spread between the classes. Because you are not owning your choices as your mistakes. Yours alone. You chose them. No one else did. Own them and then rise above them.

New Hat

2009-01-29T17:00:47Z

I knitted this hat in about a day.

idiocencratic @ 2009-01-17T16:09:00

2009-01-17T22:11:37Z

These pictures were just sent to me. The first one is of me when I was about a year old. The second one is at about three and on my first easter egg hunt. These are pictures with my grandfather who was just as big of a smart ass as I am.

idiocencratic @ 2008-12-14T11:18:00

2008-12-14T17:22:40Z

Well it is now official I am a college graduate. This is the first really big goal that I have ever completed. I am so happy and yet scared at the same time.

So now here are the things left to do:
1. Find a job
2. Pack up the house
3. Move to Seattle

Right now I am just giddy because I can add the title Historian after my name!!!

TA!!! DA!!!

2008-12-05T22:13:41Z

THIS BITCH JUST GRADUATED FROM COLLEGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pending an email from a professor recognizing one class for my minor. I AM DONE.

I am in shock. Need to find a temp job and get ready to move to Seattle.

Update....

2008-09-02T12:06:02Z

School is in full swing here. Getting ready to head out to class right now.

I am tired of being in pain. It was fun the first week but the second week it is starting to get old. Tired of having to take pills just so I can move. Tired of those said pills making me sleepy. I just have a big dose of frustration right now.

I know once I walk into the jewelry studio I will be so focused that I will forget all. It is the one and only class that I can go to right now because it is the only one without stairs.

That is it for now.

Getting a new dog

2008-07-10T04:57:17Z

Last week I went to Diana's Grove to camp with friends. Diana's Grove also runs a dog rescue on their property as well. I fell so in love with a little cutie and looks like I might be adopting her.

idiocencratic @ 2007-09-29T11:55:00

2007-09-29T16:57:14Z

This Journal has gone friends ONLY!!!!!!!!!!!

If you have been removed from my friends list and want to be added back please respond. I have removed some that do not comment that often.

I am done!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-09-04T03:20:24Z

You know I was so happy when I left High School because two faced bullshit was out of my life.

Let me clue you in on this I like to keep my life drama free. But evidentially there are those of you who do not feel that my life deserves it.

If you have a problem with me then you better get it out in the open now. Or forever shut the hell up. I do not play High School games and they will not be played in my life. If that means removing the people who like to start bullshit in my life or any part of my life, guess what you are going bye bye.

So you have three options:
1. Tell me what I have done to make you think I am the most evil person in your world. And it better be something that I actually have done. Not something that you think I have done or might do. Because then you are living in a fantasy world.

2. Get over it!!

3. Die pissed.

All comments are being screened so you can be as honest as you possibly want to. But be prepared for me to be as honest back. I will call you on your shit as well.

Greetings from Dragon*Con

2007-09-03T03:38:49Z

Yep I am in the deep south in Hotlanta (Atlanta for those that have never been here) and i am having a blast.

I will be back next year. Debating on whether to buy a life time membership or not. I have gotten many many ideas for costumes.

idiocencratic @ 2007-08-24T12:53:00

2007-08-24T17:57:18Z

Home from the hospital. So far so good.

things i learned today
-iv's suck and hurt when put in the boney part of your wrist
-when the anesthesiologist says that is the only pain you will feel he is not lying

idiocencratic @ 2007-08-17T16:57:00

2007-08-17T21:58:16Z

Friday, August 24, I go under the knife for a minor operation.

Wish me luck.

idiocencratic @ 2007-08-12T19:23:00

2007-08-13T00:29:07Z

Million things going on right now.

School starts in a week. I am not really sure how I feel about it. I know I will need to buckle down the next couple of semesters so I can graduate with a gpa above a 3.0.

I have decided not to go to Pirate Fest this year. The other girls from the booth will be going but I will not be. It boils down plainly to money. I am trying to curb my spending in a very big way so I can afford a new home in about two years.

For the past month and a half / two months I have had a problem with my right wrist. Up until about 3 weeks ago it hurt but that was it. Now I have something growing in it. I am not sure what it is all I know is that it hurts badly. I cannot do all the things that I love to do as I am right handed and using that hand for too long makes the pain almost to much to handle. I have a doctors appointment on Wednesday to find out what is going on.

Should be sleeping but something had other plans

2007-07-22T13:30:58Z

I am currently visiting the family I like.

So far this weekend I have:
1. Purchased Harry Potter (the book)
2. Gone to a Stich n' Bitch
3. Had wonderful Sushi
4. Spent wonderful time with my brother, his family, his mother-in-law, my aunt and her sister
5. Found a new hobby - one word Loom
6. Seen Harry Potter for a second time (the movie)

I have been getting crap for sleep lately and not really sure why. Usually at my Aunt's house (where I am) I do not sleep well because I am in a 30 year old bed that is tiny. But I get better sleep than what I am getting.

I am up now because I woke up with an asthma attack. WTF??? This is the first time that has happened. I could see it happening if the house was not air conditioned but it is. So I am hopped up on asthma medication. I think a nap will be in my future sometime today.

I need to find the source of my stress in my life. I am really tired of my right eye twitching all the time. As soon as I find the source it will go bye bye. So far I cannot find it. Grrrr

idiocencratic @ 2007-06-18T00:54:00

2007-06-18T05:55:52Z

A change is in the wind....

Stay tuned as fabulous things shall be happening

Damn You Morgan Spurlock!!!!

2007-05-09T17:08:48Z

Damn you for telling me the real truth about the franken foods that my government allows to be classified as Food.
Damn you for telling me the real truth about high fructose corn syrup.
Damn you for telling me about all the processes that goes into making McFoods.

Do not get me wrong I was not a complete idiot. I knew some of the things that I have read so far in "Don't Eat This Book". But some things I had no clue on. I cannot right now go into a grocery store and grab food of the shelves and eat it with reckless abandonment. I will be spending more money to eat way better than I do now.

My goal for the relative future is to eliminate all forms of high fructose corn syrup and trans fats from my diet. Good-bye my morning coke and good bye my McBreakfast.

I am surprised that I did not go running screaming into the night and just start eating bark off of trees.

idiocencratic @ 2007-04-27T18:47:00

2007-04-27T23:48:25Z

Because I am an UBER L33T geek.

My favorite muppet song done WoW style.

http://www.videosift.com/video/ROFLMAO

idiocencratic @ 2007-04-21T20:29:00

2007-04-22T01:30:39Z

I am so bored.

If I paid someone a dollar would you come and set me on fire.

Just do not know if I can do it....

2007-04-04T00:28:56Z

Many of you know that I have been busting my ass to loose weight. I sometimes get to the point that I just sit down and cry because it is just not happening fast enough. I will be honest most of the times I only come to the table with 50 - 70 % of what I really need to bring to the table.

I am not at the point that I would even consider surgery. I can get around with out problems. Hell I have started running. Granted it is not very far but I am running for the first time in years. So to me surgery is not an option.

So I am starting to re-evaluate my priorities when it comes to my weight loss.

I have been eating 1800 - 1900 calories a day. Well it is obviously not enough. I am supposed to be eating between 3200 - 3400 calories a day. A great big difference. And I just do not know if I can do it. I mean I could do it if I was eating crap all the time, it would be easy. But to eat healthy and to eat that much is constantly eating almost every hour. I fucking hate feeling like I am constantly eating.

Part of it is it is just a chore. It becomes a pain in my ass to eat all the time. Having to set aside time to eat when I would rather be doing other things. The other part is that I do not feel at times that I have the right to eat because I am so over weight. I feel that if I just stopped eating that I would loose weight in leaps and bounds. Well anyone who has tried to loose weight knows that this is bullshit and not the way to go about doing it.

So I am sitting here now trying to decide if I can make a commitment to bring 100% of me to the table.

To learn to suck it up and deal with everything.
To learn to put aside my feeling that I should not eat and realize that I need to eat (and apparently a lot) to loose weight.
To learn that people accept me for what is on the inside and not what is on the outside.
To learn that people do love me.
To learn to ask for help when I need it.
To learn that it is okay to cry when I need to cry.
To learn that I do not have to be the strong one.
To learn that I can TRUST people and they will not fuck me over.
To learn to TRUST ME.

I want to say yes that I can do it. That I can do all that I need to do to get my ass in gear and do what needs to be done. But on the other hand I am so fucking scared. I would have to leave my perfect (to me) bubble and venture into many other different bubbles, or better yet not have a bubble at all.

And to top this all off I just found out that my father is giving the commencement speech at my school this year for graduation. I am so not ready for my parents to be in my space. I am not there yet. I moved to where I moved because it was far enough away from them for me to lead my own life. And it was great for the first 9 years that I lived here. Then I decided to go back to school and for some reason my mom feels that since I am going there she needs to give back to the school that she graduated from. Yes I know most of this is my fault for going to the school my mother graduated from. I just want my life to be mine not theirs. GAH!!!

Update from HELL

2007-04-01T16:50:07Z

Things are going in full swing here. I am busy, busy, and busy.

School is almost over for the semester and I will only have (hopefully) three more semesters. The good thing is that I will be graduating with a double major at that time.

I have been thinking about how I want to handle my career after my graduation. Yes I like to think things out way in advance. It helps me keep my focus on the goal. So yes I want to teach, but I have no idea where I want to teach. So I am going to substitute teach for a year or two until I find a school/class that I want to teach at. Hopefully by then there might be an opening for me to teach on a regular basis. But then again if not I can substitute until there is one.

Faire is right around the corner. Garb is done. I have everything that I need and have to worry about nothing else. We will break ground on our booth this week and if the weather works with us it will be done by Faire except for the decorating of the booth. But the structure will be up and able to be used.

That is it for now. I have three papers to write in the next month. So I will be here but not here. I will be focusing more on school and getting things done. If you need me you know where to find me.

Quiz time

2007-03-23T05:53:45Z

If you can read this and are willing answer the questions of this quiz for me I would be so ever greatful. It is for my psychology class and no names will be used. All answers will be screened.

Answers to the questions are either true or false.

1. A woman who goes to the home or apartment of a man on their first date implies that she is willing to have sex.

2. Any female can get raped.

3. One reason that women falsely report a rape is that they frequently have a need to call attention to themselves.

4. Any healthy woman can successfully resist a rapist if she really wants to.

5. When women go around braless or wearing short skirts and tight tops, they are just asking for trouble.

6. In the majority of rapes, the victim is promiscuous or has a bad reputation.

7. If a girl engages in necking or petting and she lets things get out of hand, it is her own fault if her partner forces sex on her.

8. Women who get raped while hitchhiking get what they deserve.

9. A woman who is stuck-up and thinks she is too good to talk to guys on the street deserves to be taught a lesson.

10. Many women have an unconscious wish to be raped, and may then unconsciously set up a situation in which they are likely to be attacked.

11. If a woman gets drunk at a party and has intercourse with a man she's just met there, she should be considered "fair game" to other males at the party who want to have sex with her too, whether she wants to or not.

12. Many women who report a rape are lying because they are angry and want to get back at the man they accuse.

13. Many, if not most, rapes are merely invented by women who discovered they were pregnant and wanted to protect their reputation.

Spring Break Recap

2007-03-18T15:50:12Z

Well I am back from Spring Break.

Wednesday morning - The Butterfly House with peskyaura and her two wonderful children. I do not know how she handles two children at once. After our lunch at Pumpernickels (first deli I have been to since leaving Los Angeles where I felt like I was home). I laugh because if you do not know my family sometimes you would swear I was raised jewish.

I had to have a much needed nap from running around after her little miss and little mister.

Wednesday evening - Found me at Knitorious (a fabulous string store) with ohari knitting and bitching with everyone there. I met ona_tangent (i believe) there. Afterward we were off to dinner at a place called After further into a part of the city I did not know. We all had pie as it was pie (3.14) day. semperfiona joined us later. I had a blast just spending time with all of you. The ride home truly was awful as it was raining. But I made it back to the hotel safe and sound.

Thursday was a pretty lazy day. I needed to go to my friends K & M's to discuss some things for our booth at fair and finish some paperwork. I was pretty impressed with my growing knowledge of St. Louis as I made it to their home in just about an hour at 5 pm driving from the St. Charles area to downtown. I took a round about way but as long as I am moving I do not go insane in traffic.

Friday morning - was lunch with malboshia and then back off to the string store.

Friday afternoon - I needed more yarn for a project that I was working on and I knew I was not going to have enough to finish the project. ohari meet me there. I said a quick hello lavendargrrl to ona_tangent and purchased my yarn and we were off. Our first object was a madelaine pan for lavendargrrl which also landend me a cool new pen. It was a fountain pen and purple I had to buy it I swear. Once this was done ohari and I decided to go shoot some guns. I had a blast but was not used to the bang at first. It did not scare or startle me just woke me up. LOL. I am not the best at target shooting and did warn him. But at least we discovered I can aim and pull off a killing shot. I seemed to do better when I did not think all about the aiming thing. ohari thank you for a wonderful time. I had a blast. We will have to do it again the next time I am town.

Saturday morning - I was up relatively early. Got all packed up and headed back out to K & M's for more fair stuff. I totally forgot about it being St. Pat's day and traffic was kind of a horror going into the city until I got past Forrest Park. Then it was gone. Had a wonderful visit got some things taken care of. I hope to have the final paper work in for the booth this week so we can start construction soon.

Saturday afternoon - found me heading back home for an anti-St. Pat's party. But first I needed some retail therapy. I stopped at a DSW (designer shoe wherehouse) and went into sensory overload with all the beautiful shoes. I only walked out with two pairs but they are pretty. Got to the party two hours late but it really had just started LOL. Stayed a couple of hours and would have stayed longer but I realized that I had the ac on in the house because when I left it was hot out. So I kind of left in a hurry and the house was at 53 degrees when I got home.

I am now warm and snug in my house. I need to get out of bed and do some laundry.

I hopefully will have some good news or not so good news depending how you want to view it on Thursday. I will try to remember to post all about that when the time comes.

Spring Break Plans

2007-03-05T03:00:24Z

Well I think I have decided to spend at least part of my spring break in St. Louis this year. Yes much like last year.

At first I was not sure if this was what I wanted too do as I could not think of what I wanted to do for the better part of a week. Then as I was driving to some of my friends house today I drove down through Forrest Park. And the light bulb went off. Everything at Forrest Park is free and I have been bemoaning the lack of culturally stimulating things to do in Columbia. So Forrest Park it is.

Now I just need to decide where to get my hotel room which will be centrally located to all the places that I like to go too. I think somewhere on 270 would be a great idea but I hate the hotels at the Paige exit as it is just such a pain in the as to get on and off the Highway.

I am still deciding what days I will be there. It will either be Tuesday - Saturday or Wednesday - Sunday. Or if I get a crazy notion it will be Tuesday - Sunday.

If anyone would like to join me for shopping, dinner, sight seeing or just general tomfoolery let me know and I will be more than happy to spend time with you. LOL